In Coffee Spoons

English Comp I w/Writing Lab

What the hell why am I in this course. I wasn't able to test out of it, but was at least able to talk the advisor people out of putting me in College Reading I.

Me: I've taken advanced literature courses here.

Advisor: I see that in your records, but without the prerequisites I don't know h--

Me: I was an editorial assistant at the literary journal here.

Advisor: I see that in your records, but you aren't sup-

Other Advisor: Are you having trouble finding the code to override prerequisites? Cause it's this one. Right here. *click*

Intro to Computers

What why the hell am I in this course. Not only am I in it, but the online course filled up really quickly and so I'm stuck taking the in-person classroom version where the professor spends three hours talking about how to use Windows Vista and I spend three hours improving my chess game on Facebook. Things we covered in the first class:

• Starting your computer
  
• Logging on with your student ID
  
• Opening and navigating Blackboard
  
• Buying and using a USB drive
  
• Better control of the center by bringing bishops into play earlier
  

Intro to Health Software Systems

Exercept from syllabus course objectives:


Perform data quality analysis of the HI database
Understand statistical analysis of patient information and compute them
List and implement the elements of the UHD Data Set
Organize data elements in an MP Data Index


I am enrolled in this and in Intro to Computers simultaneously. Seriously.

Medical Terminology

This one is actually interesting in that "I am a tremendous nerd" kind of way; it's about memorizing roots, prefixes, and suffixes to translate individual terms. Yeah, I really am a nerd.

And as I mentioned on Facebook, I already know a ridiculous amount of this stuff thanks to television. (Actually, for all its raging inaccuracy, House is a good show if you just need hunks of medical jargon to translate for practice.


Since the majority of these are online and two of them are like the college equivalent of macaroni art, I want to try and add another course. There might be room in Accounting With Quickbooks, aka Spreadsheets Motherfucker.

Spent nearly a solid week in human company *and* survived/enjoyed it? Damn, my medication really is working.

I saw Annie in person for the first time since I was a kid, and it was great.

Erin made a good point- "No wonder we were friends. We've got all the same neuroses. We grew up together thinking we were all normal."

I rode back to Mt. P. with Annie and her husband Ryan (who also seems pretty cool), and met Momo The Famous Internet Cat. He would not give me an autograph, but did leave a lot of cat hair on my shirt. I'm plucking them off to sell on eBay.

The plan was to spend a night at their place, have a pizza and watch some DVDs, play Cooking Mama. We got partway through that plan when an evil death sickness swooped down on Annie like a vulture. A really sick vulture. So I ended up at Taylor's a night early.

YES, I finally got to go see Taylor, and it only took us a COUPLE MOTHERFUCKING YEARS to get around to it. We suck.

It was so great to see him, though. So much catching up about weird shit and reminiscing about weird shit at Alma to do. So much talking, so much smoking, my poor throat.

It came up at least three or four times how much he's calmed the fuck down, and how he pretty much needed to, to still be alive now. No more eating glass.

It was also good to meet Kristin, and I definitely approve of her. Which is good, because otherwise we would have had to fight with knives. Even if I hadn't approved of her, she brought me pie, and that'll pretty much win my loyalty to anyone.

Watched a bunch of movies, of course. Deathwatch, Marebito, Save the Green Planet, I Stand Alone. Gaspar Noe is fucking brilliant, but I'm not sure I could ever subject myself to one of his masterpieces a second time. FeiFei undoubtedly could. Watched Santa's Slay, but I'm not going to talk about that movie. It has eaten too much of my precious lifetime already.

Taylor taught me the basics of speed chess aka blitz chess aka crazy person ADD chess (the last title being mine), and I was surprised to find myself really enjoying it. Patience and foresight are pretty much nonexistent in my personality, so I've never liked regular chess, but this was really different. Well, except in one respect.

Me: Neigh! Neigh!

Taylor: Why does this always happen? Why is everyone who's not into chess feel drawn right to the knights, every time?

Me: In a sea of strange and unfamiliar pieces, the pony is comfortingly recognizable.

Taylor: ...probably.

Me: Neeeeigh!

Ummm, what else. Sat in one of those all-night diners while Taylor listed famous philosophers and what they smelled like. Rubbed dongs and cried. Bunch of other stuff. Yeah. But that's what comes to mind right now.

"Chess is life."

Bobby Fischer
March 9, 1943 - January 17, 2008